Step 1: Arrive
“The first step is to slow down and let your mind settle enough that you are able to drop from the heights of conceptuality back into your body, a simple form in space. Can you really feel present, in your body as it is, right where you are?” ~ Judy Lief
Be still. Find a quiet space. Create some alone time. Breathe and allow yourself to truly arrive, to fully embody your body, right here and now.
Step 2: Invite
Welcome, emotions, one and all! None will be turned away; none will be dwelled upon. As Pema Chodron teaches:
“Feelings like disappointment, embarrassment, irritation, resentment, anger, jealousy, and fear, instead of being bad news, are actually very clear moments that teach us where it is that we’re holding back. They teach us to perk up and lean in when we feel we’d rather collapse and back away. They’re like messengers that show us, with terrifying clarity, exactly where we’re stuck. This very moment is the perfect teacher, and, lucky for us, it’s with us wherever we are.”
Step 3: Let go.
Perhaps the outcome we want, or think we want, will not be what happens. That can bring up an immense and overwhelming fear. What if our love isn’t the kind of love that lasts forever? What if our love isn’t the kind that can co-habitate? What’s best for the child(ren)? What’s best of each of us, individually?
When I sit, I see how hooked I am on predicting, planning, and plotting. Letting go simply means dissolving all those extraneous thoughts and stories into thin air. Consciously choosing to stop boarding those cyclical, worrisome trains of thought, and watching the mind play its games.
We can change our lives by changing our intentions and changing our actions. It is liberating to let go and see what unfolds.
How open to each moment can we be? Remember that love is the thread that is invisibly present in all.