This is one of my favourite activities whenever I’m in a bad mood or emotionally stuck in any way. It’s simple and quick to do, and you can do it multiple times on the same ‘issue’. There are three things we do that typically get us into these stuck places: we resist a circumstance, a reality, and person, etc.; we tell ourselves we shouldn’t be resisting it; and we make it all about us, or make it personal. The antidote is allowing, or welcoming. I was first introduced to this technique via The Sedona Method (they call it Triple Welcoming), and I’ve modified it a bit here. Here are the steps (take about 30-60 seconds for each), and it helps if someone reads them out for you in a calming voice:
- Make yourself comfortable. Take a long, slow, deep breath into your belly. Feel your feet. Take another deep breath. Feel the chair or ground supporting you. Take another slow, deep breath. Notice any areas of your body that are tight or clenched (e.g., shoulders, jaw), and relax them. Take another deep breath.
- Notice the problem, issue, emotion or circumstance that is emotionally charged for you. And just let it be there, in your space. Allow it. Welcome it without reacting to it. Let it come in close and just hang out.
- Notice any desire you have to change, fix, or solve the problem, emotion, issue, circumstance. And just let this inclination, or desire, be there. Welcome it. Let it be there.
- Notice any sense you have that the problem, issue, emotion or circumstance is about you, that it’s personal, that it means something about your or who you are. And just let this sense or interpretation be there in your space. Welcome it, without reacting to it.
- And then notice (or imagine), that below all of this, there is a vast space, a vast ocean, of peace, of tranquility and serenity, unperturbed. And welcome this space, this vast “isness” below it all. Just let it be in your space.
6. Take a long, slow, deep breath into your belly. Feel your feet. Take another deep breath. Feel the chair or ground supporting you. Take another slow, deep breath. Slowly, when you are ready, open your eyes, and come back to the present.
Scott Krayenhoff is passionate about reconnection with all that sustains us, at the individual, community and societal scales. He is an ontological life coach and a graduate of the comprehensive Accomplishment Coaching coach training program. Scott has also spent over a decade as an environmental scientist, working with top professors in his field and consulting for national organizations, winning numerous awards for his teaching and communication. He is frequently told he brings a certain serenity, presence, and curiosity to his interactions. He lives in Vancouver, B.C., Canada, and he can be reached at email@example.com.
“Don’t ask yourself what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive and then go do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”- Howard Thurman