“The most important teaching of all is that we are each where we need to be when we need to be there, learning the lessons that we need to learn.” – Michelle Margaret Fajkus
You cannot fail or be a failure in the course of life. You can never even be failing at something, other than if you are failing to realize that everything that is occurring is merely feedback.
I am not just referring to the “Try again,” “Nice work,” “Lacks effort” comments; feedback is occurring all around us all of the time. Sensations, emotions, thoughts, actions, reactions, responses, and intuitions are telling us something about ourselves, those around us, and the environment we are in.
The words and actions of others are also forms of feedback, though relying on other people (parents, teachers, friends) for feedback is no substitute for your tuning in to your own feedback mechanisms.
When you put your hand on something hot when you were a child, did you need someone else to tell you not to touch it? When you were learning to walk, did you need someone to say “Good Job” in order to have the motivation to move? It did not matter how many times you fell over in the process; you did not wait until someone else told you to stand up and try again. If you feared falling (or “failing”), it was because someone else was standing there telling you not to fall or to be careful. While you were learning to walk naturally, perhaps you were also learning the fear of failing from someone else, even if he or she was trying to help.
Ok, realistically, if you learned the fear of failing when you were learning to walk, you might still be trying to learn to walk today. It is more likely you learned the fear of failing in the context of whatever it is you are currently struggling with today.
What are you struggling with or struggling to learn today? Is there something you are holding yourSelf back from doing?
What is it that you fear? What is the outcome that you fear?
Better yet, what is it that you want?
For example, why fear falling when, instead, you can look forward to walking, balancing or even leaping?
While you may think your fear is protecting you, it is causing you conflict because it is working in opposition to what you really want.
So, what is it that you really want?
This post is from Lesson 7 of I am Intelligence: 45 Lessons in Unlearning.